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  • President

    Most of you know I don't participate in the political debates on this forum, but....


    I'm running for president.




    I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE. HERE IS MY PLATFORM:

    (1) Press 1 for English is immediately banned. English is the official
    language. Speak it or wait at the border until you can.
    (2) We will immediately go into a two-year isolationist posture to
    straighten out the country's attitude.
    NO imports, no exports. We will use the 'WalMart' policy: 'If we
    ain't got it, you don't need it.'
    (3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.
    (4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our
    many observation towers on the southern border. (Six month tour) They
    will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUND aliens.
    (5) Social Security will immediately return to its original state. If
    you didn't put nuttin' in, you ain't getting' nuttin' out. Neither the
    president nor any other politician will be able to touch it.
    (6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the 40
    hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a
    passing grade.
    (7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check
    positive you will be banned for life.
    (8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method: The first time you steal,
    you lose your right hand. There will be no more life sentences -- if
    you are convicted of a Capitol Offense, you will be put to death by
    the same method you chose for your victim, gun, knife, strangulation,
    etc.
    (9) One export will be allowed - Wheat -- The world needs to eat. A
    bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.
    (10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately
    cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and
    ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll
    ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and
    each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.
    (11) The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and
    every day in Congress -- right after a prayer to God.
    (12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies,
    sporting events, outings, etc.

    Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes, but a vote for me will get you
    better than what you have and better than what you're gonna get.

  • #2
    Re: President

    You got my vote!

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: President

      What is your stance on gun control!?

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: President

        Originally posted by wrench spinner View Post
        What is your stance on gun control!?
        Sometimes I have both feet together and sometimes my left foot is forward--depends on what I am shooting at.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: President

          GOOD MAN!!!!! you have a top notch platform to bad those tree huggin tofu farting hippies may not think so!

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: President

            Originally posted by Pipestone Kid View Post
            Most of you know I don't participate in the political debates on this forum, but....


            I'm running for president.




            I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE. HERE IS MY PLATFORM:

            (1) Press 1 for English is immediately banned. English is the official
            language. Speak it or wait at the border until you can.
            (2) We will immediately go into a two-year isolationist posture to
            straighten out the country's attitude.
            NO imports, no exports. We will use the 'WalMart' policy: 'If we
            ain't got it, you don't need it.'
            (3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.
            (4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our
            many observation towers on the southern border. (Six month tour) They
            will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUND aliens.
            (5) Social Security will immediately return to its original state. If
            you didn't put nuttin' in, you ain't getting' nuttin' out. Neither the
            president nor any other politician will be able to touch it.
            (6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the 40
            hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a
            passing grade.
            (7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check
            positive you will be banned for life.
            (8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method: The first time you steal,
            you lose your right hand. There will be no more life sentences -- if
            you are convicted of a Capitol Offense, you will be put to death by
            the same method you chose for your victim, gun, knife, strangulation,
            etc.
            (9) One export will be allowed - Wheat -- The world needs to eat. A
            bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.
            (10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately
            cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and
            ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll
            ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and
            each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.
            (11) The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and
            every day in Congress -- right after a prayer to God.
            (12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies,
            sporting events, outings, etc.

            Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes, but a vote for me will get you
            better than what you have and better than what you're gonna get.
            Boy, you make right wing conservitaves look like pansies
            sigpic

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: President

              Originally posted by Pipestone Kid View Post
              Sometimes I have both feet together and sometimes my left foot is forward--depends on what I am shooting at.


              We'll be looking for you on the Ballot!!!

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: President

                Not only will I vote for you, I wanna be the V.P. right beside you.

                I believe in everything you said there and more....
                Great Link for a Construction Owner/Tradesmen, and just say Garager sent you....

                http://www.contractorspub.com

                A good climbing rope will last you 3 to 5 years, a bad climbing rope will last you a life time !!!

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: President

                  No you have to buy from Walmart if you don`t then China won`t need to buy from us in Aus and we will starve, better you starve than us, but as for capital punishment I like it.

                  Tony

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: President

                    Originally posted by wrench spinner View Post
                    GOOD MAN!!!!! you have a top notch platform to bad those tree huggin tofu farting hippies may not think so!
                    Having done a tankless estimate in Cambridge, the woman says to me: "So, um...like...um, like...I really want to cut down on my carbon footprint and am getting estimates on adding a tankless to fit my budget.".

                    My advice to her: "Each plumber that drives here to give you your estimate is probably adding months of the saved CO from the tankless to your carbon footprint."

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: President

                      Originally posted by Pipestone Kid View Post
                      Sometimes I have both feet together and sometimes my left foot is forward--depends on what I am shooting at.
                      That right there should be nominated for the comeback of the year.

                      Got my vote!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: President

                        Originally posted by Pipestone Kid View Post
                        (2) We will immediately go into a two-year isolationist posture to
                        straighten out the country's attitude.
                        NO imports, no exports. We will use the 'WalMart' policy: 'If we
                        ain't got it, you don't need it.'
                        (3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.


                        That policy would throw us into third-world status in heart-beat. If we ban imports, Oil and many other commodities will be so limited that anarchy will break out immediately. Not to mention our economy would be absolutely devastated. Luckily if you ever even made it, you'd be overthrown for your stupidity in a matter of a short time.
                        Water Heater Reviews & Water Heater Information

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: President

                          Originally posted by Service Guy View Post
                          That policy would throw us into third-world status in heart-beat. If we ban imports, Oil and many other commodities will be so limited that anarchy will break out immediately. Not to mention our economy would be absolutely devastated. Luckily if you ever even made it, you'd be overthrown for your stupidity in a matter of a short time.
                          OH BOY!!!! This is going to get ugly FAST!!!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: President

                            I am only as serious as the original poster....a little over the top, me thinks.
                            Water Heater Reviews & Water Heater Information

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: President

                              I vote to close the borders to illegals and teach our own kids to mow the damn lawn as opposed to playing video games all day!!! And at 13 it should be required that they get a job after school!! These kids have no work ethic anymore and a lot of these parents are just enablers!

                              Comment

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