Never, EVER, forget a woman's name, even for one second!
Well, last night, well technically this moring, at a local tavern I frequent, a customer (whom was rather imbibed a bit, was trying to call out one of the bartenders, (All of them female, and we are pretty much on a first name basis). He turns to me to ask what her name is, and at the worst possible time, I completely forgotten, a total brain fart. So I respond, "I dunno, I can't remember right now, I know in a second." Anyway, he finally gets her attention with "Hey nice lady!" and offeres his order. One would believe he would of kept things as simple as this, but no, he then turns to me and quite swiftly throws me under the bus, "This man here says he doesn't know your name." I get immediately reprimanded "WHAT???!!!??? NICK, you come in here all the time and I even know what you always order, yet you don't know my name???" Now I'm forced to hang on for dear life as the bus speeds along as if Sandra Bullock is at the wheel. "THAT WAS NOT WHAT I SAID!" Here he chims in, "Now you said you didn't--" "THAT WAS NOT WHAT I SAID!" "I SAID I couldn't remember right now!" "Damn you Nick!" "Now hang on! I remember Sue, Jamie, Ashley, and even Crystal!" "WHO?", "Crystal, you know, the blonde one!" "She's a part time waitress that works two days a week, and you remember HER name, but not MINE!?" (*Uh oh....Oops..here comes her foot to stomp on my fingertips) "Now look! Don't tell me what your name is, I WILL rememeber, I KNOW I'll remember! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" "Oh that is it Nick, we are officially fighting! You are on the couch!" She then proceeds to tell the rest of the crew to not mention her name in front of me, so I can't eavesdrop. Ten minutes goes buy, and well as numerous "evil eyes" I finally yell out her name "Jessica!" She turns with a snarled response, "Who's that?"
Whoo boy, I don't how the hell I did it, but I managed to get a woman to break up with me, even though we never dated once, and hardly say three words to eachother, and if that was the reaction I get for a little human error, I can only imagine the Hell's wrath I would endure if we were together!
While yes I am often 'That Guy', but to be sent to the doghouse by someone I never dated, that I have to admit is quite the accomplishment. Not that many people can say they have done the same. Not even staying single is safe anymore...Yikes....I STILL have tire tracks running accross my forehead, no matter how much I scrubbed.