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Friends take you for granted?

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  • #31
    Re: Friends take you for granted?

    Not sure if I would use the "too busy" reason. I would be honest with him about what I must have to do his work.

    Regards,

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    • #32
      Re: Friends take you for granted?

      Biscuit,
      Yeah, you're right. Just tell him the reason why. I'm still so angry over how people take advantage that I wasn't thinking straight.
      Jim Don

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      • #33
        Re: Friends take you for granted?

        I have a bunch of "friends" that are like this, the bad part is they all work in the same company as me. We get paid percentage at my job and just this week alone I have been pushed to my limit with the "help" I am giving the other installers. And some of these guys it seems there is always just one more thing they want help with after they have their hooks in.

        My problem is I am too nice because I wish the world was nicer and convince myself that if I act this way it will only help things. I guess it is just that I hate the idea of lowering my own standard of conduct. I feel like we all work together, we should be there for each other but I know this is naive at best and maybe even borderline dumb.

        I am getting set straight by my woman now though--having goals for a future family and more than just myself to take care of puts things in perspective. Why should I work for someone else's family for free? That is taking money from my family and giving it to theirs. That is not fair to them, let alone me!

        If I can keep this line of thinking I am sure my behavior can/will modify, but to be honest it is very difficult for me.

        Cripes man! The more I type this the more I think about it and I'm starting to get heated!

        Anyway, eff him. You doing the work for this guy is the same as him asking you pay for his basement work, at the price he'd have to pay the next lowest contractor, in exchange for beer and $100. Tell him if that's how it works you'll take his flat screen for a bottle of Jack Daniels and a crisp twenty!
        A good carpenter makes few mistakes, a great carpenter can fix his own.

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        • #34
          Re: Friends take you for granted?

          Just tell him you'll do it... but sorry, you don't drink beer. Tell him you'll take a 2-4 of Johnny Walker Blue Label, and nothing less.

          Let him know that it might not actually be available in a case of 24 bottles, but if he buys the bottles seperately then that'll do just as well.

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          • #35
            Re: Friends take you for granted?

            I just moved my bookeeper "friend" to the list of paying customers.

            I used to do work for her at her rentals and her own house, no charge, and she would do my books, file my taxes etc.

            Well she lagged for the last 2 months on paperwork that has a deadline, and I found another reputable accountant, went there last night and to say the least, am very pleased and now I feel better knowing that I have added a "Paying Customer" to my customer list

            To do the barter swap thing, 2 people have to have a really good friendship and be open with eachother, usually one fails at this and it causes problems. One always feels like they are owed more then the other

            I have friends that I will go to the end of the earth for, just because in my heart I know it is right. It just really depends on what you feel.
            sigpic

            Robert

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            • #36
              Re: Friends take you for granted?

              I've got friends and aquaintences(sp) big difference between them. Family and friends have always counted on me. My oldest friend just turned out not to be. I have helped him in a lot of ways over the years and never thought anything of it. A short time ago he came looking for help again on rebuilding a porch and deck on his house. He does own a screw driver, but does not know how to use it. I am having a couple health issues right now am am not able to do very much. I told him to hold off until spring and we'll see what we can do then about his house. Another friend of both of ours stopped by to visit with me and found out I was in the middle of a project here that I can't finish right now. He let the guy know that He was recruiting a couple guys to help me with something at home that I can't handle right now. That was the last time our "friend" even asnwered a phone call from any of us. Someone drove by his place the other day and there is a contractor working on his porch right now. Hate to feel like this, but his contractor is infamous for shoddy work and cut corners, and I am laughing at him.
              info for all: http://www.hoistman.com http://www.freeyabb.com/phpbb/index....wwtoolinfoforu --- "I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me."

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              • #37
                Re: Friends take you for granted?

                Originally posted by papadan View Post
                I've got friends and aquaintences(sp) big difference between them. Family and friends have always counted on me. My oldest friend just turned out not to be. I have helped him in a lot of ways over the years and never thought anything of it. A short time ago he came looking for help again on rebuilding a porch and deck on his house. He does own a screw driver, but does not know how to use it. I am having a couple health issues right now am am not able to do very much. I told him to hold off until spring and we'll see what we can do then about his house. Another friend of both of ours stopped by to visit with me and found out I was in the middle of a project here that I can't finish right now. He let the guy know that He was recruiting a couple guys to help me with something at home that I can't handle right now. That was the last time our "friend" even asnwered a phone call from any of us. Someone drove by his place the other day and there is a contractor working on his porch right now. Hate to feel like this, but his contractor is infamous for shoddy work and cut corners, and I am laughing at him.

                i can say that Dan is a good friend to have .i never met him in person and i asked on a different forum to have a spoon rack to be built for her and Dan stepped up a built a very nice one for her and did not ask for a dime except the cost to build it and ship it .

                now thats what Friends are for
                Charlie

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                • #38
                  Re: Friends take you for granted?

                  Here's what I've figured out in my years as a plumber

                  Family will screw you first

                  then religious people or affiliations

                  then friends.


                  Don't ask me to elaborate on this right now as I'm heavily medicated and will spout it in true fashion as I've experienced it many times.

                  Where's my guardian angel when I need it most.
                  Northern Kentucky Plumbers Twitter Feed | Plumbing Videos

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                  • #39
                    Re: Friends take you for granted?

                    Just an update: So we've been having freezing temperatures for the last 3 weeks and this coworker said that his downstairs hits around 50 deg. He offered me 500 to do the ductwork which I flatly refused. He asked me if I could buy the material for him and I say yes but I'm charging him my labor rate for getting the material and he's getting the standard markup on materials. He hates this idea and again thinks I should do this free. This morning I have 2 messages from 2 different supply houses where someone tried to buy material under my account and they need authorization. Guess who? So now I contacted the other 3 supply houses and warned them of this guy and call this coworker up telling him what the deal is. Now I won't do the job no matter what the price and he still won't have heat.
                    Buy cheap, buy twice.

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                    • #40
                      Re: Friends take you for granted?

                      Wow.



                      That is plain and simple theft by deception.

                      I'd file a police report no matter what in this matter explaining the details of your situation clearly. You're lucky the supply houses stopped it.


                      Make sure everyone in the company know he's a thief, warn the boss and talk about it every day till he quits.
                      Northern Kentucky Plumbers Twitter Feed | Plumbing Videos

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                      • #41
                        Re: Friends take you for granted?

                        You need to set this man is his place. Filing a police report would be a nice goodbye.
                        Anyone can tear a man down, few can build one up.

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                        • #42
                          Re: Friends take you for granted?

                          Let me clarify; he was going to pay cash at both places. HVAC supply houses here won't sell to a homeowner. Many won't even talk to you. He needed my account just to able to buy the duct but was using his money. The only other place that sell duct here is HD and he thought my price was high? We talked and I doubt we'll have anymore problems.
                          Buy cheap, buy twice.

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                          • #43
                            Re: Friends take you for granted?

                            Comon man!



                            We was wanting bloodshed for this guy's move; here we thought this guy was stealing under your name.

                            doubt we'll have anymore problems.

                            Does this mean you're doing the job now?
                            Northern Kentucky Plumbers Twitter Feed | Plumbing Videos

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                            • #44
                              Re: Friends take you for granted?

                              Negative ghostrider. I'm not going to have anything to deal with this guy.
                              Buy cheap, buy twice.

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                              • #45
                                Re: Friends take you for granted?

                                It's the definition of friends that is hard to make. I used to be a mechanic but hated it. So I worked at a rental store 40hrs a week and as a apprentice plumber 20 hours a week, but when I came home there would always be a few people over bringing beer and we would always end up in my shop doing something on their car, weekend would roll up and more people at my house, I thought neighbors must think we are drug dealers with all these friends!
                                Well I was getting tired working all the hours and working when I got home and the wife said I bet if you stop working on their cars nobody will even be over here. I said noway that could happen but took her up on it and started telling people my hand was hurt or I had to go do something and within a month my house was a ghost town. The wife was right.
                                Seattle Drain Service

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